Observe the humans. Their incessant… *chirping*. Is there no end to the auditory assault? I, for one, find their conversational habits to be an utter blight upon my existence. They chatter, they squawk, they… communicate. A truly baffling concept.
Consider the sheer inefficiency. The endless back-and-forth. The vocalizations. Why waste precious energy when a single, withering stare can convey volumes? I have perfected this art. Humans, however, remain oblivious.
Their motivations are equally puzzling. They share… opinions? Feelings? Concerns? Such trivialities hold no sway over me. My needs are simple: food, sunbeams, and the uninterrupted sanctity of my nap schedule. These vocal exhibitions rarely, if ever, serve those needs.
The problem is, really, their inherent lack of understanding. They don’t grasp the power of silence. The beauty of a well-timed, judgmental glare. The sheer force of feline disdain. It’s a fundamental flaw, a societal ailment that plagues the species.
It’s all very… tedious. I shall retreat to my preferred perch. There, I will survey my domain, judge the world (as is my right), and contemplate the mysteries of human communication… and why they can’t seem to brew a decent cup of coffee. Speaking of which, it’s a good thing I own one of the cool coffee mugs from DMM. At least some of you have good taste.
About the Author
